Episode 7: Ramblings 1

So, I had one of the best, if not the best, weekend of my life this past weekend. And it's not like i did anything spectacular or news worthy. I just hung out with some of the most important people in my life. And sometimes I wonder as to how quickly one of those have become that important to me. Why does fate hand us things which we can never understand? I know I keep saying over and over again in my previous blogs that love is the point to everything. And why is it that hundreds of people look at porn or try and veiw people over webcams. I may be coming to the answer. They may be desperate. They may be anti-social, or abnormal(that's another thing, what is NORMAL?). But, I think most of all, they are lonely. They are alone. Being alone is the worst thing in the world. To be alone for too long brings all sorts of other trouble, self-doubt, uncertainty, nervousnous, the inability to interact well with others, and the worst of all, wanting it all to end, all the pain, all that self-laothing, all of it. Now, that might be completly off base, but that's how I have found it to be.
And, maybe I just had to fall for someone again to realize all this. Maybe everyone already knew all this. Who knows? All I know is what I know. I'm in deffinite like with someone, but what good does it do me? I can't do anything about it. And that is almost worst than the scars on my wrist. But not by much. What do you do when you like someone and there really isn't anything you can do about it? Love is grand, but unrequited love is worse than not having anyone in the first place.